Relationship Stress
by Charles Wm Skillas, PhD, DD, BCH, CI, FNGH
A great number of my
clients who have spouse problems are women. I am not saying
that only women have spouse problems… men also have them,
but I don’t see them as often as I do women. Sometimes
the spouse problem is that the woman is involved with the spouse
of another woman and now we have two women with spouse problems
and one of them may not even know that she has a problem.
In most cases I encounter, the men have the upper hand in the relationship
whether the woman is married to the man or he is the husband of
another woman. The men don’t seem to be as concerned
about the relationship problem as the women are and so it is the
women who usually suffer the most in these situations. In
addition, women are generally, I think, much more trusting and
caring than men and are more easily hurt emotionally than men are.
Women, in our society, mainly seem to derive much of their emotional
security from being “connected” to a man whether in
marriage or not. Even if the man does not work and is a leach on
the woman who works, she still seems to need the emotional security
of the relationship much more than the man does. I often see beautiful
women who are working at high-paying jobs and who are intellectually
the superior of the louts they are in a relationship with become
clinically depressed if “their man” threatens to leave.
I also see many women in high paying jobs who are “involved” with
married men in the “hope” that these men will leave
his present wives and be with them. Often, the man encourages
this relationship. Why should he not? The woman is beautiful… she
gives him all the sex he wants and it does wonders for his male
ego. The man also has a built in support structure so that
now he can leave his original spouse and not be lonely or wanting
for anything. He is, literally, free to play the field leading
the woman on to believe that “someday soon” they will
probably be married and the poor woman is ecstatic that she has
this chance to be his next wife. The reason often given for
not getting married is that “we have to both experience this
freedom for a while until we get to know each other better” even
though they have had the relationship for several years.
I am not a marriage counselor or relationship counselor or in fact
any kind of counselor. I am a hypnotherapist and I see
the ravages of this relationship insecurity in depression,
anxiety, physical illness and other manifestations of mental,
emotional, physical and spiritual stress because that is what
it boils down to. Men can also have this insecurity stress,
but it appears less pronounced in relationships and more in
connection with their jobs. However, if the insecurity stress
is produced; it is deadly to the person affected.
It is deadly in that it causes the body’s systems to begin
secreting adrenaline and other flight or flight chemicals and these
can destroy the body if not dealt with. What is even worse
is the anxiety and stress produced lowers the physical and psychic
immune systems and leaves us open for the attachment of microbes
and virus’s and the attachment of foreign energies that can
literally destroy us.
Earthbound Spirits, Demons, Soul-Mind Fragments of other people
living or dead as well as alien energies and destructive thought
forms can easily attach to us if our psychic defense system is
down. We can also self-fragment producing harmful ego states
within ourselves that can negatively affect our lives. Entity
attachments or other effects of relationship insecurity can devastate
our lives so we should guard against them.
If you are in an insecure relationship… however it is defined,
think about the consequences of the stress to your overall mental,
emotional, spiritual and physical health. Find a good hypnotherapist
who can help you sort out what is happening to you and help you
fix yourself before the damage is too severe. And, this message
is not limited to only women but also to those men who have the
sensibilities to be affected negatively by relationship problems.
Dr.
Skillas is a Board Certified Advanced Clinical Hypnotherapist and
Certified National Guild of Hypnotists (NGH) Hypnotherapy Instructor.
Call 404-252-4540 for details.